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12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 4:33 pm
by Commando
... ever aired on British TV and radio. I've seen most of these before but thought they'd be worth posting up here ;)

1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'

2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'

3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'

4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'

5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god !! What have I just said??'

6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'

7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'

9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '


10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'

11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'

12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.'

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 4:40 pm
by Bipolar
ROFLGYROPLANE!!!!

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 4:41 pm
by Dezza
LMAO. Those are great

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 4:44 pm
by speed.freak
3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!' <<< LOL,what the hell does a weight lifter snatch? ROFL

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 4:50 pm
by Commando
Snatch 'n' Grab
Clean 'n' Jerk

Those are the two main methods in weightlifting (ever watched the Olympics?)

I think they're both named back to front though. They should be:

Grab 'n' Snatch
Jerk 'n' Clean

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 4:53 pm
by juiceman
Hahaha they are awesome!

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 4:55 pm
by speed.freak
oh, fair enough then.

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 5:31 pm
by Stengord
rofl wheres the 8 inches?

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 5:49 pm
by Russ.
haha pisser!

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 6:17 pm
by Kenaz
7. is teh best :D 8 inches lol

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 16th, 2008, 7:53 pm
by BLC
11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'

LOL

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 17th, 2008, 10:43 am
by 91eb40
Commando wrote:7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' '


LMAO! Classic.

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 17th, 2008, 11:45 am
by Malakai
There are some funny ones there. But unfortunately I have become immune to most humour on the internet, I just read and think "Yeah that's funny." but it has to be extremely funny to actually get a laugh out of me any more.

I think I'm becoming emo?

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 17th, 2008, 11:58 am
by Gozza
No - you have probably received it 50 million times in an email circulated via various government workers

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 17th, 2008, 12:16 pm
by Commando
That's how I received it :P

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 17th, 2008, 10:33 pm
by naz0
HAHAHAHA!!!

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 17th, 2008, 10:35 pm
by markTD
LOL Thats so random but awesome too

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 17th, 2008, 11:05 pm
by UNEZED
lolz der great great laugh from dat

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 20th, 2008, 6:37 pm
by 304-EF-Fairmont
hahaha they are halarious!!!!

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 20th, 2008, 9:57 pm
by edfamily
Thought that i would add one in, Sorry if its in the wrong spot

Neil Crompton covering 2006 Bathurst top 10 Shoot out:

He has guarenteed himself a teriffic spot for tomorrow, maybe the top spot we will find out the answer to that in a moment when the big cnts .....(Pause).....
Guns come out to conclude this shoot out.

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 20th, 2008, 10:02 pm
by 304-EF-Fairmont
haha Nice one edfamily

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 20th, 2008, 10:09 pm
by edfamily
Took a while but i found it.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=vjbR21DvwRU

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 20th, 2008, 10:41 pm
by edfamily

Re: 12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres

PostPosted: April 20th, 2008, 11:03 pm
by 304-EF-Fairmont
lol at those vids