Darwinisms

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Darwinisms

Postby Commando » November 23rd, 2007, 1:02 pm

Post up stuff about retarded shit that you've done or your mates have done that you think is so retarded that it earns a Darwin Encouragement Award. Here's mine:

I dub last night The Dumbest Thing I've Done In 2007 (Hopefully).

I was looking for something in the little shed in the backyard (2m x 2m). It was dark. The outside light didn't light up the shed enough, and the dolphin torch was dead.

Dave's solution: the oven lighter! I felt like an innovative genius who should be up there with Da Vinci and Edison.

I went into the shed and flicked it on. The flame was flaring & sputtering instead of holding a normal little candle-sized bud of light. I stared at the flame thinking "hmm, that's very odd! What could be causing that?".

I then looked down at the jerry can holding 10L of unleaded. Awesome.

So hopefully that's my retardedness out of the way for 07 :-)
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Eb Barbie » November 23rd, 2007, 1:44 pm

Haha your a tool. I do silly things a fair bit that people seem to find funny. Spose they are called Blonde moments though :P
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Bipolar » November 23rd, 2007, 2:03 pm

Reversing along the gutter out the front of dad's new place for the first time. It was night time, and had there not been a drain halfway up I would've been fine. Hence why now I only take pics of the EL from certain angles. Dish would be helpful.

Last week I didn't look up at the screen and got on the wrong train. Luckily before too long I realised there were strangely more bogans than usual, and unburied my face from these forums to discover I was on the wrong line. :(
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Steady » November 23rd, 2007, 2:06 pm

Trying to reverse my mums Mazda SP23 out of the carport, its the 6 speed manual.
Took me about 5 minutes to figure out that to find reverse you have to push down.
Damn boxes with more then 5 gears!!!
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Damo » November 23rd, 2007, 2:07 pm

lol Dave. It's not like the Jerry can would have exploded* or anything you soft cock. I dropped a cig on the mower once when I was filling it up, picked up my smoke and continued filling. Good times!




*may or may not be true.
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Malakai » November 23rd, 2007, 2:54 pm

Boogy boarding in a swollen creek after a thunderstorm with my brother and some friends. It was just like white water rafting only without any thought for safety, it really is a wonder any of us are still alive. It's the sort of thing you hear about on the news when someone doesn't make it. This was quite a few years ago.
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Dansedgli » November 23rd, 2007, 2:58 pm

1 week after my 18th I had a car load of mates following another car load of mates. We were driving down a dirt road at 100kms in phillip island. Genuis in the passenger seat goes "do fishies". Me being freshly licensed agreed and we fishtailed up this road from side to side at 100kms/hr.

Approx 3.5 seconds later I lost it and we went over a spoon drain and managed to settle in some long grass about 3mm from a wire fence. We landed directly in between 2 telephone poles. Didnt try that again ever.
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Gozza » November 23rd, 2007, 3:13 pm

Overtaking people on the wrong side of the road in excessive of 120 kph - i over took 4 people - in a 60 zone - swerve to miss on comming car - massive rush of adrenaline that nearly made me orgasm/blackout/die can't ascertain the exact feeling
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Commando » November 23rd, 2007, 3:20 pm

Damo wrote:lol Dave. It's not like the Jerry can would have exploded* or anything you soft cock. I dropped a cig on the mower once when I was filling it up, picked up my smoke and continued filling. Good times!




*may or may not be true.


Crazy farker. I see you don't value your eyelashes :geek:

Actually a mate of mine nearly blew his head off when trying to smoke a rabbit out of what looked like a wombat hole. He stuffed heaps of shredded newspaper in the hole & poured 5L of super down there. Crawled in, lit a match, & shot out like a cannonball :lol: He lost his eyebrows, eyelashes, and all the hair in front of his ears

Dumbshit.

He pointed a loaded .222 at me once as a joke. In his mum's laundry. Had the finger on the trigger & everything, I shit twinkies.
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Dansedgli » November 23rd, 2007, 3:24 pm

Guns are bad in the wrong hands.

We were shooting a 12 guage at a burnt out car with cans on top if once. I blocked my ears as my mate was about to shoot. I watched people arguing not hearing them. He shot the gun and I copped those ball bearings in the face. 1 miss my eye by about 2mm and dug into my skin. I copped a few in the arms as well.

The dumb kent aimed for the tyre and they all ricocheted back at us. If I wasnt covering my ears I would have known to cover my eyes. :/
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby Rollin » November 23rd, 2007, 5:59 pm

I drove into a pole at powercruise in front of 11tybillion people, at about 5km/h tops....was looking over my right shoulder at a powercruise official cause I thought he wanted me to stop, and drove into a massive yellow pole - did $1600+ damage to the RHS of the car, thats including I did a lot of the work to fix it myself :(

That 1600 could have gone towards a proper clutch :(
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby slo_sprint » November 23rd, 2007, 8:48 pm

My best for this year was when showing a new bloke at work how to hone a hydraulic cylinder barrel, he pulled the hone out of the barrel while it was still spinning and since i was standing quite close to it there was a good chance it would swing straight into me my instant reaction was to grab the shaft that the hone was attached to and rip the **** out of my hand...........Not the brightest idea i have ever had i must say.
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Re: Darwinisms

Postby private9 » November 24th, 2007, 9:03 pm

When I was 18, was on the freeway doing 100 in a VW kombi - mates yelled try to do a fishy as a joke, so I decided to do speed wobbles instead - just ripped the wheel from side to side, and had the arse of the damn thing moving from lane to lane. Very lucky to have not barrel rolled the thing, and I don't think I've tried something that stupid since.
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